Monday, March 30, 2015

Siding Up!

We had a walk through at the house yesterday. Originally Josh was going to go during his lunch but my mom got a wiff of the appointment and then one person turned into seven adults and three kids. 

Every time we go for a visit, our realtor meets someone else in our family. By the time this home is finished she'll be practically family herself. We wouldn't mind, she's great. =)

Our future garage

Cakes, I mean, Mr. Crane busy working.

Mom and Noe hanging out in the living room.

My grandparents in our dining area

Siding Up!


One day we are going to look back on these pictures and all those goody feelings of nostalgia will creep up.

This is getting real folks.

Sunday, March 29, 2015

Recap

We had a pretty great weekend.


You?

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

A Privileged Burden

When we were up north visiting Josh's grandparents during Christmas I had a moment to myself one morning. Grandpa Mike had his devotionals sitting near the dining table so I grabbed one and flipped it open to a random page and started reading.

One chapter titled, "Early Mornings At The Manse - How A Father Fights For His Faith And His Family" nailed me from the inside. It is the author's morning prayer for his family.  As I read it the weight of those words convicted me. I have been convicted to pray for my husband and my daughter with a fervor I have not exhibited before. God tells us to pour out our hearts to him and he will give us those desires. Who else wants more for them than I? No one. Who else can pray as a wife for her husband and a mother for her daughter? No one.

A portion of that prayer:

I was wondering the other day about people who pray for you. I mean, REALLY pray for you. In an intimate and committed way. Probably not many right? And so I know that the burden of laying Josh and Emerson at the throne of Grace is on me. A privileged burden.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Happy Almost Friday

Turns out that fever I mentioned last week was actually Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease courtesy of MOPS. One little baby brought it in and subsequently 7 others got it - and counting. I do not wish a feverish baby on anyone. An incredibly helpless and exhausting experience. But the little is back to her old self and so Josh and I are almost back to our old selves too.  

Me and Yoko are off to grocery shop for the week. Yes, I know it's Thursday. Whoops! But that also means it's almost Friday!


Peace.

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Monday, March 16, 2015

The First Year of Motherhood

Trying to write a summation of your first year as a parent is near impossible. I have started and restarted this blog so many times but then I read what Em Henderson had to say about the matter and I thought exactly.

Here’s the thing: the first year of motherhood is ONE  big dichotomy- a total emotional whack, actually. I feel powerful because I DID THAT and every day I continue to do that. BUT I feel powerless because I am tied emotionally to him at all times and I feel like I can’t make my own decisions any more. I feel beautiful because when people are in love they are more beautiful, and my smile is so broad and genuine. But I feel ugly because my body isn’t exactly up to par and I went ‘mom’ real fast. I feel like I nail it because there are days when the home-baked frittatas are received with a huge YUM, and naps are totally effortless. And yet I miss it constantly because, I mean …  so many reasons - he’s still drinking bottles at night, he only has like 2 play dates a week, his ‘brushing of the teeth’ is a total joke, etc. You name it, I feel like I’m missing it. I feel so grateful and like the luckiest person on the planet, while at the same time feeling like a total martyr; as if I do everything. I don’t. Brian is a serious 50/50 parent but it doesn’t negate that weight on my body. I feel so much pressure and I feel so tired all the time, but so does Brian. It’s easy to feel like a martyr when you are a parent, no matter how much of the work you are doing. I feel young because I am so much more playful and silly then I used to be, and yet I feel kinda old because vacations now are us going to Sacramento instead of Laos.

I would add that I am different because it's not about me anymore. Every decision revolves around the little, not because she's an only child but because that's what happens when you have a child. I can see why God made the progression the way he did now; single, marriage, child, children. Because only the extraordinary could jump from single to multiple children and stay on top. Each step in life really makes you more and more selfless and more and more humble. I am less judgmental of others and much less opinionated about stuff that doesn't matter. I'll hear something now and think, 'I have no energy to give to that'. I am a worse friend and certainly not as good of a wife. And while the answer is because of less time, less patience, and less energy, that is certainly not an excuse. I have gained weight and while I care, I don't have the energy to care enough.

I had a miscarriage while we lived up north. It was devastating for both Josh and I. Heart wrenching, can't talk about it, type of pain. So much hope followed by so much grief. So when we got pregnant with Emerson we held our hope in check. And with each passing milestone we'd breath a sign of relief and thank God for letting us get that far. Then she was born and we knew the weight of the miracle of life. Watching her this past year has molded our hearts into something deeper and more meaningful. It has truly been our privilege.

"And I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and in the sea - I heard everything everywhere say, Blessing, honor, glory, and power belong to the one seated on the throne and to the Lamb forever and always!"  Revelation 5:13

Sunday, March 15, 2015

She's One.


My thoughts on it all next. 

Thursday, March 12, 2015

Thursdays with Mimi

My little has a fever. Don't worry, Josh and I have already over reacted - I canceled work and Josh cleared his schedule in case he needs to come home. =)

Thursdays are normally our Mimi days. We are usually off on some adventure or another. She helps me to loosen up and I remind her that the baby can't have iced tea and chocolate yet. :p 


If you need us we will be resting at home, hiding from this heat. Stay cool friends!

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Back To The Birthday






This is one of the only pictures I have with Emerson. It was before the party began and we were just walking around.

My little was so tired by the time we did the cakes. She just zoned out and sucked her fingers. And aren't those smash cakes adorable? My sister in law, Kylie, made them.



These guys, the bread and butter to these girls. And to my Cakes too. He was too busy running around and going down the slide by himself to take many photos. =)



The whole party was put together by family and a few close friends. Our inlaws did the food, my mom the amazing dessert bar, Kylie the cakes, Leah the over the top beverage table, Grace the hilarious game, Kaoru the balloons, Luke the photobooth, Aimee's mil the favors, my mil the activity for the kids, and the rest was Aimee's vision and our hands going to work.

What a wonderful close to their first year.

Emerson's actual birthday is on Sunday and I've got lots on my mind heading into that day. Stay tuned!

Rootin and Tootin

6 days out from her first birthday, my daughter takes her first solo steps.

I was in the kitchen getting her dinner ready doing the whole one eye on the food, one eye on her thing. She was standing in the living room gnawing on a wooden duck and, as if it was no big deal, took two steps forward, then three more. Then she slowly lowered herself to her knees and continued about her play as if it was all nothing.

Then for the next thirty minutes all the food prep was forgotten as I tried to get her to do it again on video. To no avail of course. Last night I backed up my phone, deleted all my videos and photos. I was determined to get it on video today.

Well, how many videos did I attempt today? Too many. And the one time she walked to me I didn't have my phone handy. Figures. But four little steps to mama. Four tentative but confident steps - the moment forever engrained in my head. It was beautiful. You root for your kid so hard and when they get something you can't help but celebrate. That's why I get the moms who are always toot'in on facebook about their child's accomplishments. Toot away moms. I'm root'in for your kid too.


Sunday, March 8, 2015

A Celebration Of Two

We celebrated Emerson and Noe's first birthday on Saturday. It was casual and wonderful. 








More pictures and details to come. 

Friday, March 6, 2015

Friday Favorites

Did you know that super heroes practice during the day so they can be the ultimate crime fighters at night?


We are celebrating Noe and Emerson's 1st birthday with family and a few close friends this weekend. ONE. Josh and I are considerably nostalgic and wish for more hugs and cuddles. In the meantime Emerson does not see the importance of giving us hugs and cuddles.

Have a cuddly weekend friends.

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

The Sovereignty of God

This past week Josh and I believe that God has affirmed our decision to move to Santa Clarita. While the money has already been turned over and the papers signed, in the back of my mind I still wasn't sure. When there are so many options before you it is hard to decipher what to prioritize. And when you have children the decisions you make for your family become even weightier.

And here's the thing, God used many different avenues to speak to us. For me it was someone who spoke to me at church and for Josh it was financial. Not a coincidence that the big guy was speaking to us in our own areas of worry.

Trust in me!

"One reason [biblical] doctrine is so precious to believers is that we know that God's great desire is to show mercy and kindness to those who trust him. "I will make with them an everlasting covenant, that I will not turn away from doing good to them; and I will put the fear of me in their hearts, that they may not turn from me. I will rejoice in doing them good...with all my heart and all my soul" (Jeremiah 32:40-41). God's sovereignty means that this design for us cannot be frustrated. Nothing, absolutely nothing, befalls those who love God and are called according to his purpose, except what is for our deepest and highest good" (Romans 8:28; Psalm 84:11) [excerpt from Taste and See, John Piper]

I do not know what decisions are before you today, but before you make it, I encourage you to lift it up to God. Let Him guide your way.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

She's not on her own yet, but she's close.




Just yesterday she was barely learning to sit up on her own and now this.

What's next? College?